I am a bit emotional this morning. As much as my kids drive me crazy sometimes, like at Target yesterday when I had to pin a screaming Luke to the counter with my knees so I could pay and leave, I am going to miss them incredibly next week. I know it will be extremely good for all of us, we definately need some time apart, but it will be strange not having them there all day. And it is yet another milestone. I can't believe my baby is going to be ten this year and this is his last year in grade school. He has changed so much physically this summer as well. He told me that he must be getting older because he has "man hair" on his upper lip! He is also taller, tanner and more handsome than ever. I can't wait for him to start orthodontics in December though, his teeth are really worrying me. It seems like just yesterday that I had Luke, Caitlin and Jonathan and now they are going off to kindergarten and trying to be more independent every day.
I am struggling with the changes and time passing. One of the things I hate about growing older is the changes. The most obvious being the loss of loved ones. I have lost so many people that I love - my dad being the hardest and then my aunts. So often I wish that I could go back in time and relive moments just to get those times back with my dad, my kids as babies and when Sean and I were newlyweds.
I think I am also struggling with change in regards to our house. We still have no clue when we have to leave, but it looks like next year. I have been working so hard at cleaning and realize how much I love it here when it is clean. I wish things were different, but I try to remember that God has something wonderful in store for us. I just wish I knew what and when!
Facebook has been wonderful for reconnecting. I just got a message from my friend James this morning. I have known him since 1992 and he was one of my very best friends at SAC. We haven't been in contact since 1997. He was such an important part of my life during that time as were Carrie, Sara, Mel and Robbie who I have reconnected with. I heard from my cousin Karen as well and am grateful for the chance to chat with family that I don't often see anymore.
My friends are so important to me. When I make one I try to nuture that relationship well. I don't always succeed and with 4 kids and a husband that come first, I don't have as much time to spend as I'd sometimes like, but I try. That's one thing I love about cards and letters through the regular mail. It is a way for me to say "hi, I am thinking about you, I appreciate you." Even if I don't say those words I mean them. So to all my friends out there I do love and appreciate each and every one of you.
Sean and I are looking to the start of the school year as the start of time together again! We will get from 9 until he leaves at 2 to be together!!! It has been so long since we have had together time on a regular basis. When the trio was in preschool we had 2 1/2 hours, but that was always taken up with running errands and the like. We will have time to just sit, stare, and make faces at each other if that's what we want to do. I am looking forward to hubby time.
Have a great day. I am off to spend time with the fearsome foursome and double trouble (my nieces Carmen and Scarlett.) Enjoy your day!