God's Hands

I am at a point in my life where I need to make a decision and I am stuck. I am completely lost as to what I need to and/or want to do. I am just about done with my course (I am stuck on the last 2 projects and spent an hour sobbing about it yesterday.) and need to look into a job. Yesterday as I was talking to Sean I told him I feel completely unprepared. I haven't retained much information nor do I feel like I got much out of the class. I am a hands on learner and this didn't provide that opportunity. I would be lost if you put me in front of a computer with Excel or Powerpoint and said to use it. But this is what I had to do. We couldn't afford any other option. To take the class through a school it was $735 a month and I didn't qualify for financial aid because there were not enough hours.

We have since found some resources out there that might help us with the cost and Sean wants me to look at taking a course through the school again. A big part of me wants to and is excited at the idea of it, but a part feels it would be selfish and a mistake. I would be spending about a year in school to get the certfication I need.

I am at a loss. I am trying so hard to put it in God's hands, but don't know how.

How can you not love these kids!

When I downloaded the pictures I saw Gabe wasn't in most of them, then I looked and realized that they are of playdates and Gabe always opts to go somewhere else....can you blame him?! All the 6 year and under kiddos would drive any 11 year old crazy!!!!
Andrew chewing away and Steven

I believe it is Batman Tanis and Obi Wan Steven

Jakob aka Indiana Spiderman who doubles as a Mexican Wrestler....

Batman Luke

Cailtin, Tanis, Tyler, Jonathan, Luke, Ethan, and Isaiah

Zay's tonsils

Jonathan. This picture makes me smile!!

Caitlin and Gretchen

The little Squirt, Gretchen

Tanis and Caitlin. Look where Tanis has his eyes....

Tanis in the outfit HE chose. It was not my doing Kellie and Brian! I swear!!

Gabe, Caitlin, Luke, Jonathan and their family of snowmen.

Finally......a haircut for Luke!

After my disasterous attempt to get Luke's haircut last month, my mom picked him up from school and took him to their regular stylist to get a haircut. She said he was so good! I am very proud and I think he looks so handsome!! He was rewarded with dinner at Casa Fiesta with grandma and a toy from the Dollar Tree. Pardon the droopy eye, I got him with the washcloth while scrubbing his face! I am so proud of him!

Valine

UPDATE Valine, her husband and her parents are safe! Praise the Lord!!

This is my friend Valine and her husband Humbart. They live in Port au Prince, Haiti. She works for Compassion International and is a beautiful person and wonderful friend.
They haven't been heard from since the quake. Please pray for them and the safety of their families. My friend, Lydie is also Valine's cousin. I was in touch with her today and they have recieved no word on any of the family.
This is such a tragedy. I am praying for the best - It is all in God's control.

I am in thinking mode today. I have had so many thoughts racing through my mind.
First and foremost is worrying about the safety of my friend Valine and her family. They live in Haiti, right where the quake struck. She is a friend of mine from college and a wonderful person. Please remember her and her family in prayer.
I am also wondering about diets, jobs, books, illness, family, organization, laundry, exercise, friends, finances, kid's homework, kid's behavior.... My mind just won't shut down today!

I hope that you are all having a wonderful day. Tomorrow I should be a great aunt.....AGAIN!!!

Goodbye 2009!

Look at the crazy pj's! Tanis, Luke, Johnny, and Caitlin enjoying fondue.

Adults didn't get any as there seemed to be a lot of double dipping going on, but the four of them didn't care!

Tanis really enjoyed the chocolate!

Proof that I was indeed there

Popping the thingys to celebrate the New Year! They made a loud popping noise and streamers flew out. The kids (and Auntie Kellie) enjoyed them. Luke was zonked out in the corner sound asleep.

The New Year's crack

Yelling Happy New Year's out the front door.

The infamous black raspberry champagne (I believe) and some weird game that was kind of cool. Notice the bottle of water....that is what the cool people drank!

After midnight and showing no signs of being tired!

After midnight and showing no signs of being tired!!!

They can't seem to see each other without doing horsie rides! Hopefully this will stop as the years progress...

The tiredness is setting in....


We always enjoy our New Year's Eve with Kellie, Brian, Tanis and the dogs. I gorge myself on Kellie's sausage,cheese, and rye thingys and we play games until midnight. It is better now that the kids are older. The first time we did it they cried. Alot.

Kellie and I showed off mad Euchre skills and we played some weird D&D-esque type of game that was pretty confusing, but fun.

Sean decided after that night that he wouldn't mind getting a pug when we go to get a dog. I think Scamp, Kooky, and Izzy have made quite an impression.

It is always fun to ring in the New Year with such great friends.

Some People Stink

Many of you may have noticed my angry Facebook status yesterday. I wanted to tell you what happened.
Sean called me from work last night. His friend Kathy had been looking at the local newspapers website. On it people can form a screen name and comment anonymously on articles. She had discovered that someone was using the screen name Jerry E------- (my maiden name) is dead.
Why? Why on earth would someone do that? It is neither funny nor appropriate. I don't understand.
I immediately called my sister who had just discovered it herself. We didn't want my mom to see it - that was our main concern. Thankfully my brother in law was being sworn in for city council last night which was covered by the local media. Amy was able to speak with someone from the paper who apologized and said it would be removed asap. When she checked at 8 this morning it was gone.
Do people not realize that writing things like that is hurtful? My father was a well known member of the community and I know made some enemies over the years, but come on!
Some people need to get a clue and think of how their actions will affect others.

Positivity & Me!!!

I am going to be a more positive person this year. Tomorrow we start Harris Healthy Eating and Allover Wellness 2010. I am involving the kids in meal planning and they are excited. We are really going to work together as a family. I have a pair of black pants in my closet that are my first goal pants. I can't wait to post a picture of me wearing them on here!! That is my motivation for this first part. I also have a shirt that I bought two years ago to wear to the summer party that has never fit. That is going to be a goal too, but I think more like the 3rd or 4th. I am going to be journaling a lot more to try and work through the depression I am struggling with. It has been a very rough few weeks, topped off with the disclosure that my grandpa has Parkinson's disease. Apparantly this has been known for sometime, just not by me!
I finally had talked to my mom about the way my grandfather has been acting - there was an incident on Christmas Eve and also the following Sunday. My mom hadn't noticed it, but listened and said she would keep an ear open. We had a good conversation, and she actually listened.
I really want to change this year. Physically, Emotionally, Spiritually. I want to be a better wife, mother, friend, daughter. I want to like myself again.